When to Quit and When to Stick to Your Goals

We all have moments in life when we feel like quitting.

Although quitting is usually associated with failure and a lack of grit and perseverance, it isn’t always a bad thing.

Sometimes a true sign of mental toughness isn’t trying to push through and force things – it’s having the discipline to stop, and to quit the things that are no longer serving you.

Working towards anything worthwhile will usually involve an obstacle that Seth Godin calls “the dip” and James Clear calls the “valley of disappointment.” It’s a lengthy period of time where you don’t see the results of your effort and it’s unclear whether you’re actually moving towards your goal…if you are in fact chasing the right goal.

You could be close to a breakthrough, in which case all you need is a little more time. But maybe you’re moving towards a dead end…or even worse, a cliff.

The decision to quit or stick is often influenced by the real or imagined opinions and expectations of others (what will they think of me if I quit?). It is also influenced by the sunk-cost fallacy: the more effort, time, and resources you have already devoted to a thing, the harder it becomes to step away.

Here are a couple of examples of dips:

-You set a goal to compete in a 200-mile gravel race in the spring. But after a couple of months you realize that the training required for it leaves you feeling beat up and exhausted, dreading getting on the bike, and having no time to spend with family.

-You’re halfway through a graduate program (a huge investment of time and money). But for the past year, you’ve felt burnt out and are seriously doubting whether you actually want to pursue this work anymore.

It can be hard when you’re in the dip to know if you should quit or stick. This is something I have always struggled with, both with my training and other aspects of life.

Regular self-reflection and feedback can help make sure that your decision to stick or quit is strategic, rather than reactive.

Reactive quitting = impulsive and panic-driven.

Strategic quitting = a conscious decision you make based on your current reality and new information and experiences.

Here are some questions to ask when you’re in the dip:

-What sort of measurable progress am I making?

-Is my persistence going to pay off in the long run if I stay the course?

-Is this something I still want to pursue, or something I feel like I need to do? (Because of the expectations of others, the sunk costs of time, energy, etc.)

-Am I panicking and making a reactive decision?

Remember, your goals are not carved in stone, and you are not the same person you were when you first started down this journey. Goals and the processes to achieve them should naturally evolve over time as you grow as a person and your circumstances change.

Quitting ≠ failure.

Have the courage to quit the wrong stuff at the right moment.

The idea of “the dip” comes from Seth Godin’s book of the same name, which I highly recommend if you want to read more about the topic.